A child development expert has sparked fierce debate after suggesting that **parents should ask their babies for permission before changing their diapers**. The controversial claim, reported by The New York Times, argues that even infants are capable of learning the foundations of bodily autonomy if adults frame routine care through the language of consent. While some praised the approach as progressive, others blasted it as “absurd” and “impractical.”
The advice, shared during a recent parenting conference and now widely circulating online, came from Dr. Emily Kane, a childhood behavior specialist who has long studied how early interactions shape long-term boundaries. According to Reuters, Kane urged parents to treat diaper changes not as mechanical chores but as opportunities to model respect. “It’s not about expecting babies to say yes or no,” she said. “It’s about building the habit of asking, waiting, and making eye contact — signaling that their body belongs to them.”
BREAKING: Parenting expert says parents should “ask permission” before changing babies’ diapers to teach consent from birth. — @nytimes
Reactions from parents have been heated. On platforms like X and Facebook, many ridiculed the suggestion, arguing that diaper changes are often urgent, messy, and hardly a time for philosophical lessons. As CNN explained, critics say the idea burdens already exhausted parents with unrealistic expectations. “When a diaper is full, I don’t have time to negotiate with my newborn,” one mother posted. “This feels like overthinking basic care.”
But advocates for consent-based parenting insist the concept is being misunderstood. According to The Washington Post, Kane clarified that she isn’t telling parents to literally wait for verbal approval. Instead, she recommends narrating the process — saying things like “I’m going to change your diaper now, okay?” — and giving the child a moment to respond with eye contact, movement, or recognition. “It’s about teaching babies they have a voice,” she said. “That message carries forward into childhood and beyond.”
“It’s not about waiting for an answer — it’s about teaching respect for bodily autonomy.” — Dr. Kane on diaper consent. — @CNN
The debate has now spread into politics and culture. Some commentators on The Los Angeles Times argued that the uproar reflects a generational divide, with younger parents more open to concepts of consent training and older generations dismissing them as unnecessary. Others fear that exaggerating the idea could trivialize serious conversations about consent and abuse prevention. “This isn’t about diapers,” one advocate told reporters. “It’s about breaking the cycle of teaching kids their bodies don’t belong to them.”
Internationally, the story has drawn similar reactions. BBC News reported that the concept of teaching bodily autonomy from infancy is not new in some countries, where caregivers are trained to speak openly to babies during medical or hygiene routines. Still, the specific framing of “asking permission” for diaper changes has fueled mockery and skepticism, particularly among parents juggling the relentless demands of infant care.
BBC: “The debate shows how parenting advice can polarize across cultures. For some, consent talk from birth is empowering — for others, absurd.” — @BBCWorld
For now, experts stress that the idea is less about diapers themselves and more about modeling language of respect. As Rolling Stone put it, the controversy speaks to a larger cultural battle over how parents should raise children in an age of heightened awareness around consent. Whether embraced as progressive or dismissed as impractical, the claim has forced millions to rethink something as ordinary — and universal — as a diaper change.
