We all get disappointed at some point in our lives. People break their promises and break our hearts. However, these experiences are important life teachers and without them, we wouldn’t understand which people truly care about us and which ones only pretend to.
If you have been disappointed in people lately, below is a list of 6 truths you need to know.
- When someone mistreats you, it’s the reflection of their worth, not yours. When people mistreat you, you immediately start to think that there is something wrong with you and all your flaws and shortcomings become so apparent to you. It can also damage your self-esteem without any valid reason. However, it is completely not your fault. There are manipulative and toxic people who like to take advantage of others. They don’t know how to deal with their own problems, thus, they lash out and bully others. If people behave badly with you, it is not your fault – it is completely theirs.
- It’s your expectations that leave you disappointed. When you get disappointed in people, it is mainly because they didn’t do something that you expected them to do. Thus, it wouldn’t be fair to say that people disappoint you. It is your expectations that become unfulfilled and make you disappointed. People change and they can’t always be there for you. Instead of having unrealistic expectations from others, you should evaluate what people are really capable of doing.
- People are neither bad nor good. In fact, we all sometimes behave badly. We all have positive and negative sides. Thus, saying that all people are bad or that all people are good is a false generalization. If you think about people in such extremes, you will for sure become disappointed.
- We all have flaws and struggles. Many people, except manipulators and toxic individuals, don’t really mean to do bad things to others. Sometimes they mistreat other people because they are dealing with their own issues. For example, you get mad that your boyfriend didn’t text you all day. Maybe he had a rough day at work? Maybe he had some family issues? You have to keep in mind that it is not always about you.
- You are responsible for setting your boundaries. Although you can’t control other people’s behavior, you can control your own and you can set healthy boundaries and stick to them. For example, if you have a friend who is only there when he needs something from you, it is ok to say no to him instead of having false illusions that he will become your true friend.
- You are responsible for communicating your needs. We have problems in our friendships and relationships because we don’t know how to communicate openly and honestly with each other. In many cases, people disappoint us without even realizing it. Thus, it is important that you communicate your needs and feelings to them if you want to avoid such situations in the future.